What Happened To Just Being Nice

Last night was curriculum night at the school. I try to go to as many school functions as I can. I don't really have the opportunity to volunteer in the classrooms like I would like to with everything going on with LaLa and Ham, but I still want to be involved at the school. I like walking in the door and the principal and the secretaries know my name. I go to curriculum night so the teachers know that they are appreciated and my kidlets know I care about what they do in school. I also think it is funny that teachers who are up in front of kids all day get so nervous speaking in front of parents. But seriously after being in the same school for 6 years I am pretty familiar with the school and the curriculum used. Well last night was a first. I was sitting in Roo's 1st grade class room with about 10 other parents and a teacher so nervous I don't know if she could remember her own name. A parent asked a question and the teacher was having difficulties answering her question. So me being the big know-it-all that I am - NOT - answered the question. It was about something that I am very familiar with and felt comfortable answering the question. Well apparently the other mother didn't appreciate me butting in and was quite rude in her response to me. I was a little taken aback and thought maybe it really wasn't my place to answer, but I think her reaction was a little over-the-top and maybe she was just having a bad day and yadda yadda yadda. Here I was making excuses for someone that was rude and spiteful to me - for making the huge mistake of trying to help her.

I later learned that she is on the PTO board of our school. The board that is suppose to be working with the school and the parents to make the school better for our children. Next week is the big kick-off PTO meeting for the year and the meeting where they are going to ask us to volunteer our time and money. How willing do you think I am to go and help out? And now I am upset with myself because I have allowed myself be dragged down to the level of pettiness that confuses me. UUUGGGHHH!

  • Do you volunteer at your school?
  • How do you deal with rude and mean people?
  • Am I just a big whiner?


  1. Your entry sounds alot like mine on Why do we volunteer? It still amazes me that these people who love, care for and make decisions about our kids act like this. I know that I have my moments but I try to contain myself in public. How do I deal...avoidance. Maybe after things cool off I will say something to them. I am not confrontational. I say that I am the bigger person and am doing it for my kids. I can't be sucked into being angry, bitterness and holding a grudge. So I usually just move on...and when they ask I usually am first in line to sign up again!

  2. lene,
    Hopefully she will be embarrased when she sees you for acting like that, and will apologize. If not, be bigger than she is...BE REALLLLLLY RUDE BACK!!!!!!
    Jus kidding. Avoid and talk to the teachers and aske what they need not what the PTO needs.
    She will soon figure out that it is not wise to bite the hand that feeds you!
    Love you

  3. Lame! I just don't understand other moms getting mad at other moms.
    Hey, at least she's not YOUR MOM. Be happy with that.

  4. I think that in a culture of "volunteers" as occurs with many PTO's there are those who would take for granted the nature of a volunteer. That is to say that they expect what is, in any other society, unexpectable. They seem to believe that it is duty and obligation that motivates us all and that despite how we are treated, we still come back because of it. That is usually what ends up being their motivating force. The way I deal with rude people is kill them with kindness and where that does not work return the favor with interest. :) Some people don't realize their own rudeness until either it is shown in contrast or reflected in others.

  5. I agree with your sis.. Help the teachers as much as possible & forget the PTO. If that is how she treats other parents she shouldn't be in the pto..
    I'd be fuming right along with you & would probably end up saying something.
    No I don't help with the pto, I help when the teachers ask for things & I send in things they need. I feel the pto asks for way too much & I am frustrated that with the end of the 1st week they are already doing a fund raiser & get the kids so hyped over it. They seriously do fund raisers every month..
    And with all the supplies we have to buy at the beginning of the year for each class. I think they expect a lot & take advantage of parents...
    Ooppss sorry for going off on this. No one has ever asked me before!

  6. I would be furious and probably would not be able to let it go. I never feel it is necessary to be rude. I usually just try to avoid mean people, but it would be extra hard in this case. Good luck!

  7. I help out, only when I am made to feel the queen. No, not really but it does make it easier. I volunteer all the time. I let the person in "charge" take the lead. If a teacher is more than willing to let me do whatever, I let my volunteer thoughts and actions run wild. If a teacher is no, don't need ya, then she will have to specifically ask if she would like help or things bought for the class. The old saying, Don't bite the hand that feeds ya". PTO, well we have nazi's. They like to run it, and be know it alls but they need the little worker ants to make it work. Catch more bees with honey and I do believe slavery was abolished. So, uhh, yes masta! LOL
    No, you are not a whiner. With people who have no problem stating their opinions I have learned that even though I may feel rude while delivering a message in the same manner. Those people take no offense. Because that is their language. They will not take it offensively at all. When they put that rude "crud" on my plate, I politely turn it away and plop it right back on their plate where it belongs.